It was the second when i say it to you..
When I said we are over now..
It was the moment i thought i dead already..
When i felt nothing no more but pain..
The world just start to spining like there is no tomorrow..
The room is seems like no stuff there but the white wall..
The ground i’m steping seems like no base and unreal..
The view is turning black and no shadow at all but your siluet..
I know it would hurt me so bad and deep..
I know it would makes me so dying screaming your name..
Yes i know.. but i can’t turn back time to replay it all..
Yes i’m sure.. it can’t make you change and love me truely..
Thats why this second i’m so letting you go and fly away..
Thats why this moment i’m telling my self that i’ve never had your heart..
For this i’ve sacrifised my heart and my soul to you in many way..
For this i’ve been asking my self why we should come to an end..
Because you will never know how much i loved you..
Because i can do anything more to show it all to you..
Have you ever asking why i’ve done so much for you..
Have you ever telling me why i want it all so much from you..
No it will never happen.. it will never meant to be..
Because all i am to you is just somebody you have’nt known..
No it will never make you be mine.. it will never can be..
Because you are just my dream that i can never make it shown..
Cenz~
What’s Unwritten has already been said..
This letter i’m writting is speaking whats in my mind..
To know that i can’t tell you more to make you realise..
Just let me shout out this letter to free my mind..
The hope of a future secure..
The hope of a brigther tomorrow..
The hope of a deeper love from you..
The hope of a honestly truth from you..
No i don’t see that all.. I can’t feel that all..
Yes i’ve been tryinto see.. I’ve been tryin to feel..
But there’s still no cure.. There’s still no return..
How can you say about love and care.. Like this..?
For my endless sorrow of heartache..
Save me from this emptiness i feel inside..
Remove the smiling mask i’ve always shown..
Break these chains of pain and set me free..
If you won’t then don’t..
I don’t mind letting you go..
Then to have only your name not your heart..
Cause i need more than words but acts..
Cenz
I often close my eyes
And I can see you smile
You reach out for my hand
And I’m woken from my dream
Although your heart is mine
Its hollow inside
I never had your love
And I never will
And every night
I lie awake
Thinking maybe you love me
Like I’ve always loved you
But how can you love me
Like I loved you when
You can’t even look me straight in my eyes
I’ve never felt this way
To be so in love
To have someone there
Yet feel so alone
Aren’t you supposed to be
The one to wipe my tears
The one to say that you would never leave
The waters calm and still
My reflection is there
I see you holding me
But then you disappear
All that is left of you
Is a memory
On that only, exists in my dreams
I don’t know what hurts you
But I can feel it too
And it just hurts so much
To know that I can’t do a thing
And deep down in my heart
Somehow I just know
That no matter what
I’ll always love you
To be so in love
To have someone there
Yet feel so alone
Aren’t you supposed to be
The one to wipe my tears
The one to say that you would never leave
I don’t know if this is right or wrong..
Loving you sumtimes is a gift for me..
But affraid that i will be a curse to me..
Nothing i can prove before i experience it..
Needing you is my ego to have..
Bleeding heart is my sacrifise to give..
Reason to belive in your love is that i have to find..
Prison to shut my heart is what i have in my mind..
I will just give it all to you..
My heart.. thru my soul..
Although i dont know what brings happiness to me..
I would just telling my self that it will come to me..
Maybe i can’t make you be the happiest man in life..
But i can and will be the best for you to have in life..
Giving you all you’ve needed and all you’ve ever wanted..
Just sit there next to your side when you really need it..
Taking chances is not the way to prove anything at all..
But i will try to give my best to make you prove it all..
None of them can bring me down to believe in you..
Unless you shown me that nothing in me is connected to you..
I just want you to know that..
I love you..
I need you..
I care for you..
Cenz~
Tomorrow.. Will my decision still be the right decision.. ?
Tomorrow.. Will my statement still be the honest statement.. ?
I’m sad.. I’m happy.. I’m affraid.. I’m curious.. I’m confuse.. I’m sure..
Did i just lie to my self..
Or..
Did i just lie to my pain..
Did i just follow my heart..
Or..
Did i just follow my emotion..
Which one is the right one.. I dont know..
He must be treat me better.. But what if he’s not..
He must be true to me.. But what if he’s fake…
My Heart is frozen.. But i still want to love..
My Pain leaved a scar.. But i still want to cure..
My Mind is empty.. But i still want to think..
My Hope is over.. But i still want to try..
Maybe This is the only way to let me try for the last time..
Whatever happens just got to be happen..
Will it be satisfying or no.. At least i’ve tried..
~Cenz~
Sometimes i feel there’s no body around..
when the fact is there are lots of them..
Sometimes i heard no voice around..
When the fact is there are noises..
Always act like i could stand strong enough to face it..
In Fact i’m so scared deep inside to realise it..
Always act like it was easy to get through..
In Fact i’m afraid to pass it through..
But in reality.. i must have faith that i can do it..
And Truthfully.. i gotta face it..
Only tellin’ My self that no body could change it..
And Finally i found my self win all of it..
Being Lonely is part of humans life..
Everybody must ever feel lonely over their life..
Just remember one thing in my mind..
That there’s must be someone to be mine..
~Cenz~
